Mastering the Art of Procrastination

There's actually no art in procrastination. It's just pure, unadulterated laziness combined with complacency that stems from lack of variety or sheer boredom. Well, you're not actually completely lazy because you still get to do something more interesting to you than what you're supposed to do but putting off something more important to a later time is still laziness.

Why? Because I said so. And delaying something that you can do now. That's definitely laziness right?

Yes. I'm lazy. I'm very, very, annoyingly lazy. I'm supposed to start my fitness routine now but here I am, typing on this Jurrasicly slow laptop, thinking of the next words to say.

We are going out of town and I was really hoping for a better bod so that I could fit in my swimsuit without some very obvious bulges in the coming three weeks. Three weeks. And I'm still not panicking.

If you could picture my room, please stop. Let me do the honor. I have plates in here(Yes, I eat on the bed because I'm too lazy to eat on a table.), clothes scattered in my bed, books lying on the floor etc.

I hate myself. If I'd get a cent every time I procrastinate, I'd be a millionaire now. That's how severe I am when it comes to procrastination.

Some people seem to be always on the go. Not stopping even just to smell the flowers or catch a breath or even eat. Like there's an itch to do something whenever they're not doing anything. Sometimes, it feels good just bumming around. Let me help you.


9 Ways to Procrastinate

1. Do not take a shower early in the morning. Or at all.- Whenever I shower, I feel like doing something productive most especially when I do it early in the morning. So don't take a shower or you will be compelled to get up from your beloved bed.

Source: Picturequotes.com

2. Upon waking up, check your social media- This eats up at least an hour of my morning which could have been spent taking a bath, cooking my breakfast, going to where I should go to in an earlier time etc.

Source: Giphy.com

3. After checking your social media, play the games on your phone- Smart phones have resurrected our inner childhood by having apps and games that distracts our mind from focusing on more important things.

Source: Giphy.com

4. Do not plan your day ahead- Going with the flow of your day without prioritizing things to do will likely waste some of your precious time like buying groceries before going to the bank or doing household chores late in the day then going to somewhere important. Because surely, the traffic will get crazier later in the day and with more traffic comes more stress.

5. Drink hard or go out on the day before your appointment.- The next day, you will be hung over which will render you useless for at least half of the day which will eventually lead you to cancel the appointment.

Source: Dailystar.co.uk

6. Postpone any important appointments to meet up a friend.- Friendship comes first right? Anyway, gossiping is faaar more important than going to a financial literacy seminar and you can still attend it next month or the month after or after three months when the stock market already crashed. (Please don't.)

7. Watch a movie. Or two. Make it three while staying up late- Anyway, the park is just there and you can jog whenever you want to. However, there's a typhoon coming in next week so it's going to be the week or weeks after the typhoon. Or typhoons.

Source: Firsttoknow.com

8. Stare at the ceiling pondering about the same things over and over again and still having the same conclusion.- Need I say more? This really takes up time before you sleep which will make you stay up late as well.

9. Do all of these everyday.

I hope that as I have helped you on your baby steps towards procrastination, it would also help me towards my fetus steps in fighting off my laziness and procrastinating.